I am a sister

I am a sister…

Sort of. My mom and daddy had 3 daughters; Judy, Betsy & Meri. Growing up I thought they were my sisters. Judy had a son my age and one older. Betsy lived in the Midwest. Meri lived here and there.

Judy babysat me while my mom worked. Mom was a school bus driver so babysitting me consisted of before and after school only. I loved being at my sister Judy’s home. My nephew Tony and I watched cartoons before school. How I loved the Flintstones! Judy was the sister I was closest to. She was more like a mother to me. She taught me to sew and attempted to teach me to crochet. I sucked at crocheting. As I grew up Judy was the one I went to with my problems. To this day I have a split second where I forget she has passed and think I should call her to ask her how to do something or various other things. How I wished that she were still alive to see us finally rescue my step children. She loved them so much and ached at their misery as much as I did. I miss her desperately. To this day the moment I get out my cutting board to sew I cry.

Betsy came and went from my life. As I wrote earlier, she is the egg donor. Growing up I always thought of her as my “favorite sister”. I didn’t know why, but I did. I hardly ever spent time with her; my family went to Nebraska to visit her every summer. That was about all the time I spent with her my entire child hood. But, she remained my “favorite sister” for years. She had a daughter, Sara. Eventually I came to consider her my sister too for a brief time. She however is not a mentally stable woman, having lived through a difficult childhood (our egg donor ditched her too), a difficult adolescence and now into a difficult adulthood. I have no contact with either of them anymore. In part it is a relief, but I am occasionally wistful for the time Sara and I shared a close relationship. It passes when I remember all the damage she has done and assisted in. But still, I miss her.

Meri also came and went from my life. She was displaced as the baby when mom and daddy adopted me. I think she resented that from the beginning. She and I became close for awhile too, but I think the bitterness and resentment that she considered I got what should have been hers from our parents eventually led her to do some really horrible and dishonest things. She actually stole things from my mom every time she came to visit and when she helped mom move just so I couldn’t have them. I feel very sorry for her. I can’t imagine living with so much anger, bitterness and resentment for so long.

With Judy gone now, I don’t really claim to have any sisters. I really was raised as an only child, so it isn’t too much of a stretch.